Kelli Calabrese
Have you heard about e-diets? Meet the woman who trailblazed this realm, Kelli Calabrese. For those who haven’t met Kelli, she is an author, international speaker, consultant, and coach specializing in women’s wellness, fitness boot camps, longevity, and life management. After undergoing an excruciatingly painful divorce, Kelli achieved her certification as a Divorce Coach to get healed and help others do the same. It has become her mission to captivate and empower the lives of thousands of people, inspiring them to become their best.

The highlight of today’s episode is the inspiring and powerful story of Kelli Calabrese, one of the most amazing women here in The Underdog Show.

Listen as Pamela and Kelli talk about the following:

– What inspired Kelli on her journey to where she is today?

– Kelli’s inspiration to be an exercise therapist at such a young age of 13 years old?

– How did her Fitness Coaching journey and business start?

–  With her to transition into an online business for fitness and e-diets, what urged her? And how did things go from there?

– Kelli’s drastic and painful experience in divorce and how it changed her trajectory

– What would Kelli tell herself if she met her younger self?

– Kelli’s Plans for next coming 6-12 months?

Find out how Kelli unfolds her story. Listen to the full episode here:

– Apple iTunes: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/underdog/id1534385651

– Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/6FbSDu0aNtuxAEiderUAfB

– Website: https://theunderdogshow.com/

If you found this story worth your time and has made changes in your life, don’t forget to subscribe and leave a review.

Catch up with Kelli on her social links here:

– Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/IamIntentionallyFabulous

– Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/iamintentionallyfabulous/

– YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCfNQxjK67fPfwtM_PutB0xg

– LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/kellicalabrese/

– Website: https://kellicalabrese.com/

– Email: kelli@kellicalabrese.com

The Underdog Podcast host is none other than Pamela Bardhi. She’s rocking the Real Estate Realm and has been dedicating her life as a Life Coach. She is also Forbes Real Estate Council. To know more about this amazing woman, check out the following:

– Website: https://pamelabardhi.com

– Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/pamela_bardhi

– TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@pamela_bardhi

Click To Read The Transcript

Kelli Calabrese Shares Her Journey in Transforming Lives

Kevin Harrington
Hi, I’m Kevin Harrington, an original shark from the hit television show Shark Tank and you’re listening to the underdog podcast

Pamela Bardhi
Hello, everyone, and welcome to another episode of underdog. Today I have an incredible guest here with me Kelli, how are you my friend?

Kelli Calabrese
Hello, I am awesome. It is the best day of my life. Thanks for having me.

Pamela Bardhi
I love your energy. The minute that I got on the call with you. I was like, I love her. She’s so great.

Kelli Calabrese
Was that fun?

Pamela Bardhi
I love it, I always start off these interviews with the most loaded question because it’s so important. What inspired you on your journey to where you are today?

Kelli Calabrese
As a great question, when I was 13, I wrote in my journal, that I will be an exercise therapist. And I really had no idea what that meant. I didn’t even think it existed when I was 13. But I just loved when I was moving, running, dancing, jumping, swimming, cheerleading. I just loved it, I was like, What did people not get about this. There’s just like this whole endorphin high that I really loved. But we also do things to move away from pain.

And I had a really strong family history of heart disease, diabetes, obesity, cancer, alcoholism, smoking, and nothing to do with that. So I set out on a journey to wake up every day to help people be well because I hate lack. I hate poverty, I hate injury and illness and disease. And so much of it is within our influence. That’s what excites me every day.

Pamela Bardhi
I love that. Kelli, I love it. So you mentioned you wrote you wanted to be an exercise therapist. That’s 13.What did you want to be before that like?

Kelli Calabrese
Well, that was in my journal, at 13. And I had to wait until I was 17. To get certified. It seems so long. But I did I got certified in 17 and I had three college degrees by the time I was 22. And since then I’ve gained a lot of certifications and wisdom along the way. But it’s always lined up with helping people be well.

Pamela Bardhi
That’s incredible. And as a young kid did you want to be like the same thing less than 10 years old. Same thing.

Kelli Calabrese
Always as far back as I can remember, I just loved moving. I was just happy when I was riding my bike. And it just felt so good and it wasn’t that my home was like so unhappy or negative. But my parents were really hard workers. They had multiple jobs, multiple businesses, so I was always working. So the only time I wasn’t in school or working, I got to go to a dance lesson or you know, ride my bike on the sidewalk. And I just loved it.

Pamela Bardhi
That’s incredible. So who or it could be multiple people or things inspired you at that age.

Kelli Calabrese
Definitely both of my parents, they came from very humble beginnings. My dad was in orphanages and foster systems. So he really did start with nothing and had a challenging childhood. And my mom was the youngest by far her sister was 20 years older than her. So the parents were kind of older and really almost ready to retire by the time she came along. They were kind of you know, both on their own, and they met when they were 10, Married at 20. And they decided that they were going to make a great life and love their kids and have the things that they didn’t have growing up.

Pamela Bardhi
That’s incredible. So both of your parents were that’s so interesting. My parents came to the US when I was five years old. So like we all came together. There’s nothing like seeing that grind. You know, when you see your parents at such a young age, working and like building a life together. There’s nothing more inspiring. I feel like

Kelli Calabrese
Yes, that has always been a dream of mine to work with my spouse because that’s what I saw my parents do. My dad always worked for the city of New York. So we had like the steady benefits and job. But he had a construction company and then over time they opened delis, restaurants, pizzerias, and that’s what we did after school. We were stocking shelves and cleaning dishes and host a saying and all that kind of stuff.

Pamela Bardhi
That’s so funny, so there’s a parallel between you and I because I started working at my parents pizzeria when I was 10. So I know the exact feeling. It’s like after school, okay, awesome. Most kids go and do their homework and whatnot, you will be answering phones and working there. That’s awesome. So walk me through, so after you got those certifications, you had these degrees by 22. What happened next in your world,

Kelli Calabrese
Actually went of going back to the very first place that gave me my job when I was 17 at the health club, and they gave me a full time job as the director. And over a short amount of time we opened up for locations I became a partner. We had multiple corporate fitness locations that we were managing like Calvin Klein, BMW, a TNT Nabisco. Then I also founded a school because back in like 1990, there weren’t a lot of personal trainers. So I had to train them, so I contacted the certifying organisations and said.

How do I prepare people to get certified and they said, we don’t know. Here’s the textbook. Why don’t you figure it out? So I prepared over 3000 people over nine year period to become certified medical exercise specialists and post rehab technicians. That was the first 14 years of my career before my kids were born and it was so fun. I started working there at 17. And I worked there all through college and then when I graduated, I went there full time, and we expanded, we grew.

Pamela Bardhi
So you’re like 22? Opening? Five different new locations? That’s incredible. And becoming a partner. Did I hear?

Kelli Calabrese
Yep. So I bought it and had some sweat equity over time and became a partner with the original person who opened them. It actually was 35 years this week. So it’s been a long time.

Pamela Bardhi
Holy crap. Hold on a second. Kelli, I got to figure out what is it that drove that motivation in you at such a young age? Because that is not normal? As you know,

Kelli Calabrese
Yes, I had that work ethic and me from my parents. But there’s really like a deep desire in me for people to be well and be healthy. And I’m a knowledge person. So I was always going to the conferences, always hiring consultants, how do we help more people? How do we make more sales so we can help more people? And how do we grow this, how do we scale this? How do we get more people jobs, it was just exciting. It was a neighbourhood fitness centre.

And it was the centre of the community where people came and we did a lot of outreach. We did things in the town and things for kids and we did birthday party. I mean, we did so many fun things there, I literally took vacations with these people where I’d make some adventure vacation. Like we’re gonna go out west, and we’re gonna hike and bike and whitewater raft and climb mountains. And they would, you know, we’d do trips together. It was just a family extended family, it was a lot of fun.

Pamela Bardhi
That’s so cool. That’s incredible. So you expanded those locations. And then after that experience, what happened after the fitness?

Kelli Calabrese
So my son was born, and my intention was, I’m going to pop this baby out, and I’m going right back. I’m gonna get it and put him in daycare. And the day came, and I sat in the parking lot and he was six weeks old. I walked into the daycare, and I looked at that crib, and I could not lay the baby down in there. And I called now my former husband and I said, I’m going to figure something else out. And I went home. And I found a babysitter who could come for four hours a day. And so I was trying to work remote back then 22 years ago. And I finally said to my partner, can you buy me out and the Internet was really just getting going in 2000.

So I became an online one of the first online trainers. I was a lead fitness expert for E diets, which at the time was the largest subscription based weight loss programme, and I brought in the fitness component. And that really opened up a whole new world to me of doing media interviews and understanding how the technology can work to reach people all over the world. And then I started writing more and speaking more, because I still wanted to contribute to my industry on a really high level. But I didn’t want to give up raising my kids.

So I had to come home and figure it out way before COVID. Like from home, be able to have this platform. And I really had two different parts of my business where I helped consumers who wanted to be healthy. But I also trained trainers on how to be servants how to be business people, how to lead How to Grow how to expand. So I was consulting with industry leaders and fitness-based hospitals, centers. And so that was for probably the next five or six years. And then I get into doing fitness boot camps. And I was introduced to network marketing, had a couple of best-selling books got to speak all over the world be on all the major networks, so it’s been fun.

Pamela Bardhi
Casuals? That’s so awesome. Oh, my goodness. Wow. So first off, COVID must have come in. You’re like Been there done that.

Kelli Calabrese
That didn’t affect me.

Pamela Bardhi
Whoa, funny. That’s so cool. And so how was it being one of the first trainers ever to do everything virtually? Because I can only imagine what that hurdle was like at the beginning.

Kelli Calabrese
Yeah, the platform with E diets where I started, they were number one in the world at the time for weight loss on the web. They were even before Weight Watchers to be online. So I got to really be grassroots with literally creating the figures that would do the actual exercises. And figuring out all these different algorithms of if someone has a knee injury. Then not this exercise this one and so it was kind of cool to be at the foundational levels of creating those kinds of programmes. And then we were doing chats back then and I bet had hundreds of people in a chat room from all over the world. We started running contests, and it was just fun learning how that all worked way back then.

Pamela Bardhi
That’s so fascinating. Oh, my goodness, but then it opened up this whole new platform. Yes. Um, what I also love too, is I mean, you were very comfortable where you were, right doing what you were going to do. But the fact that you listen to your heart and you were like. I’m gonna figure something else out. I know that kids were the motivating factor, but like, some people won’t even make the change even then. Like. What would be some tips that you would offer someone that was is looking to have more of a work life balance really. Because looking to make that jump and doesn’t quite know how to figure it out

Kelli Calabrese
Yet you need to, at some point decide. You need to be decisive and make a decision, you have to get out of that comfort zone. Everything that you have in your life right now is a result of every belief, every thought, every action. And so you have what you have. Because of how you think if you want something new, you have to take that step. You have to have that risk in you enough that you’re willing to make change. I don’t think people are going to really have any regrets because they know what their life is like now.

So this is it. If there’s something more you have to do something different to get a different result, it’s scary. But for every entrepreneur, this is how we roll. This is what we do. So I’m not saying go out and quit your job to anyone. But at some point, if you look at the people who are the most successful, they are good at making decisions, they are good at taking risks. And yeah, you’re gonna fail some Yeah, you’re gonna get knocked down 10 times.

But you have to have the resilience to get up that 11th time and follow your heart. I mean, I do like to have quiet time and really sit and consider and see what I get in more of like a heavenly realm. Like how am I feeling in my heart about this? Is this a yes or no? And I will ask for confirmation like bless it or block it, like open the door, close the door.Try and get like three different confirmations on like, Okay, I’m doing this and then once you decide, you just have to go and figure it out.

Pamela Bardhi
That’s amazing. Kelli. So that tells me a little bit in the spiritual realm into energy work and all of that. It’s been a big part of my life. Like everyone’s like them your energy, like just like, Oh my God, dude, like, we can feel it, we can sense it. And it’s like, it’s so interesting when you can learn how to manipulate energy and listen to it and really trust it. What it can do in your life and how it can transform things.

Kelli Calabrese
Absolutely, I’m all about him in the very lowest form of energy is victim. And man I hate that I hate like the world is happening to me. There is nothing that I can do it and we all might get there in a moment. But it’s not a place to stay like you can feel sorry, have the pity party for a moment, but don’t live there. And the very highest level of energy is that love joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, gentleness, self control, as the highest.

The tipping point to go from the bottom victim to the top love is courage. You have to have that courage, that resilience that you know, get past the fear, get out of the comfort zone, to make things happen and stop being a victim. Which means being vulnerable, admitting your fears, you know, really facing it, and doing it anyway.

Pamela Bardhi
I know, it seems to me that you’ve done a lot of personal development work to in what you’re saying. Because I’m like somebody who’s worked on themselves definitely speaking here, because there’s no other way of like. She’s done so much self reflection in her world to get to where she’s at. That’s without a doubt. I mean, especially the fact that you just you dropped everything you’re like, I’m gonna figure this thing out. Even though you had something perfectly good going on, you know what I mean?

Like, you just kept on going and you followed your heart and you kept moving forward. And then it brought you to this beautiful world, and then eventually into speaking internationally. Getting on major networks, and all of that. So can you tell me about that experience as well like what it was like. Like kind of elevating from all of that, because I’m sure this was all kind of new. Like diets was like number one in the world and then seeing all this take off?

Kelli Calabrese
Yeah. So I actually was on the Stairmaster. One day when I was looking at a Shape magazine that had an article weight loss on the web. And there were three different companies that were listed there that they were comparing, and none of them had an exercise programme. So I just wrote all three and I said, Here’s my resume, if you want to develop a fitness component to your your weight loss plan, here I am. And all three respondents said when can you start and I was like, there’s something to that. So I started with E diets. And because I did so much media work with E diets, even when I wasn’t with them any longer.

They kept calling me all of the people who are doing the interviews kept calling me back. They’re like Kelli, you’re so good, you’re tight, you’re bright, you’re responsible, you know, your, your material. And so I got to do a lot of media and I started doing media tours, where companies would call me to come in and I’d be featured on NBC and Philadelphia or CBS and in Miami and all the local networks. So they would bring me in as a lifestyle expert, fitness nutrition expert, and they’d bring me in say, seasonally, like hey, Kelli, give us some tips for the winter.

You know, how do we boost our immune system and it might be sponsored. But I got to be on TV more and a lot happens by word of mouth when you show up and you’re good and you care and your content, you get referred. So I actually got referred to speak for Sir Richard Branson for his health clubs all over Europe called Virgin active, so that was really fun. And things happen by what I call God students. You know, they’re just being aligned and you get introduced to someone and so much happens by referral. But also putting yourself out there and letting people know. Here’s who I am, here’s what I do, here’s how I roll. I can help you let me know.

Pamela Bardhi
That’s awesome girl. The road just grew organically. Together, that’s incredible. And then leading you to your books. You have three best selling books. Yeah, I do.

Kelli Calabrese
Yeah. The first one is called mom and dad, Honduras and that was, again, pre COVID. When it was about putting your family first and not sacrificing your kids for your career. And I told 29 different stories in there of families. Whether they were traditional families, single families, blended families, adoptive families. Where they figured out a way that they could have a great lifestyle and not have to go to the office every day and work. So there’s a variety of different stories really to give people hope especially whether it’s a mom or a dad. If you went to school, you have a passion in your heart, you want to give back. You want to contribute, you want to be a mom or a dad. But you still want to have meaning and purpose on your life.

And so this gives them a lot of different examples for ways that they can do that from people who did take that chance. People who had corner office degrees, all of that, and they missed the girls dance recital. They’re like, You know what, this isn’t gonna work for me, I need to be at the dance recital. The corner office isn’t worth it. I’m gonna figure another way out. Um, the second book is called Passion Easter’s. And that really was intended to be written by a more mature woman about what would you say to your younger self. So it was like wisdom from millennial women and what we found is that men are loving the book, older women.

Pamela Bardhi
Like me out, are you.

Kelli Calabrese
And millennial women are awesome. I mean, there’s so much that I learned from them. They’ve just got so many cool things that are different from my generation. I’m in my 50s, so that’s a lot of fun Fashionistas. Then the more recent book was called success habits of super achievers and that was over 80 people who told their story. Ordinary people who someone usual adversity happened to that they really overcame that and did something extraordinary and really made a difference. So I recommend people read a chapter a day, so there it’s a couple of pages in someone’s story. And when you read that story, you’re like, wow, if they did that. Then I could get up and face my day and make some stuff happen.

Pamela Bardhi
I love that Kelli, oh my goodness, you are such a rockstar and I love the trajectory between. It seems like every single area of your life brought on like a new book, if you will.

Kelli Calabrese
It’s been so fun. The success habits stories are incredible. I mean, I get humbled. When we meet someone, we have no idea what they’ve been through. Whether they’re happy or grumpy, or we don’t know what brought them to this season. Some of the happiest people have been through some of the most difficult things. But like you said, they did the deep work. They did the soul work, and they live from such a place of gratitude.

Pamela Bardhi
What’s one of your favourite stories in there? I don’t want to give away the whole thing.

Kelli Calabrese
I’ll give away my story that is called disrupter. And it’s about really finding my passion. Again, my disruption was, I was cruising along thinking life is awesome. I got two amazing kids been married for 24 years living in a state neighbourhood, the vacations. The cars the whole bit and my husband comes home after 24 years and says my commitment to our marriage is zero and he left and it floored me. I mean, it took me to my knees emptied me out. Really made me question everything in my life. And it’s sent me on a three year what I lovingly referred to as a sabbatical. Where I just go on this healing journey to figure out how this happen to me? How did this tornado come in and blow up my life leaving this gaping hole of pain with everything scattered everywhere.

And so the overcoming part was I really did figure it out. I figured out who I was, I learned to really forgive not just him. But myself, I was able to find new purpose and renew my mind from the past. And release that bitterness and that anger and depression and denial and shock and all the things that you go through. When you go through grief that I didn’t even really know about. Even though I had had grief in my life prior to this. This was the thing and come to a place where now I empower women to overcome the fear, the rejection, the grief, after going through a major loss. So that they can create this amazing bonus life that they didn’t even know was possible, so that was my story. In the book.

Pamela Bardhi
Thank you so much for sharing that Kelli. And I mean, I just turned 30. So not many people in my age group that I know of yet. That right now is like a lot of weddings and all you know, everything’s happening right now at this point. What I do have a lot of friends in the business realm. And just everywhere else in my network that are going through or have gone through divorces and I don’t even know what to say to them.

When I say I’m sorry. They’re like, Oh, no, it’s okay and I’m like, I don’t know what how do you help someone who’s going through something just as like an outside person? And then of course tips on the inside as well. What you want to get into is how do you empower and break away from that space? Any guidance would be

Kelli Calabrese
Yes, so we are not equal. wept, my goodness. I had friends who got divorced. And it’s like if someone says, they lost a baby that had their house burned down. They had an abortion like, unless we’ve been through it, there was really no way like you don’t know unless you’ve been through it. And I feel like I really was a bad friend, do you, my friends who are going through divorce because you don’t realise the suffering the pain, the difficulty. So refer them to me to help them, but love them where they’re at, just sit with them, sometimes just check in on them, send them a song, send them a positive quote. See what they want to do, take them to the movies make them feel beautiful, just a lot of times in a place where there’s such deep self hatred.

So you mentioned 30. That’s actually the number one age for divorce. The number two age for the divorce is 50. But 54% of all first marriages do end in divorce, the person who leaves feels a lot of shame and guilt for breaking up the family. The person who’s left feels rejection, deep, deep rejection, and it’s 50 50. Sometimes a woman leaves sometimes the man leaves. And so knowing which one left might help you to know which one are they dealing with. If they’re feeling rejected, then you make them feel loved and honoured and seen and heard. And because there’s so much self hatred that goes on. So just shining the light on the truth of who they really are, and that their identity is not in being a wife or a husband. But there’s actually more than that.

And if they were the one to leave, and they’re feeling that guilt and rejection. You know, while you’re in it, it feels like it’s never gonna go away. The pain is always going to be horrible, It’s just so far reaching. It’s not forever, it’s for a season, but it’s more than just time, time heals some. But it’s the intention that really can help get you fully healed. And accelerate the process where you can get to a place of joy and celebration again. You’ll know someone like when they walk in the room talk about the energy you can feel. When someone’s depressed or bitter that energy is on them. So always shining the light, always holding up truth and love.

Because a lot of times when you’re in that deep pit of a place, you’re in that victim place. So bringing in good energy, bringing in love, listen, love them unconditionally, not even necessarily giving advice. But asking good open ended questions sometimes get some to think a little differently and see their situation a little bit differently. And then really do get them help. I mean, I did a retreats, I went to conferences, I listened to TED talks, I had counsellors, I went to the healing place. But divorce coaching is really what I’m doing. So you can refer anyone to me, and I would love to help them.

Pamela Bardhi
Do you do? Yeah, cuz it’s just like one of those topics that it’s like, if you haven’t been through it. You don’t really know what to like how to help someone. So that’s super impactful and helpful and like you said, 54% of marriages now. And divorce, which is so bananas to think about.

Kelli Calabrese
And the rate on second marriages is even higher. Because wherever you go, there you are, and the second time around, you’re less patient. And when you have a blended family, it makes it even that much harder. When there’s kids involved, a lot of times they are the reason for the second divorce because it’s challenging.

Pamela Bardhi
Wow, that’s fascinating. I mean, I always wonder what the dynamic of how that goes. But a lot of my friends are going through it or have gone through it. And I’m just like, I can’t relate personally. Because I’m like, I just got married. I’m all new to the whole realm. And a lot like my friends and my peers on the millennial realm. We’re all on the same boat, everyone’s getting married and all that stuff, because a lot of my friends especially waited. It was like very late 20s, early 30s is when they’re all getting married. So it’s interesting to see those statistics of how it all comes together and how to help too, so thank you so much for that insight. Because now I can at least try to somewhat direct it based on what they’re going, but it’s never easy.

Kelli Calabrese
Yeah, it is a body mind spirit. I mean, it hits everything physically, financially, emotionally, relationally, professionally, everything. Usually you change where you live, and you might change your kids schools and your friend group may change. Because all your friends were couples. So it’s just a lot at one time, in addition to court, and now you’ve got to hurt people hurting each other. And it can go well, and I do help with you know, navigating, mediating, really guarding your heart, being confident how to figure out the best way to go into mediation, that kind of stuff.

Pamela Bardhi
Thank you so much for that, Kelli and so what about if someone’s going through this. And their husband was the breadwinner, or the significant other was the breadwinner?

Kelli Calabrese
Yeah, so I mean, hopefully they can negotiate. It’s like I’m in Texas, so it’s 50 50. So it just gets whatever the assets are whatever’s in the accounts. The home value, all of that it should go right down the middle. But there’s always room for negotiating things, but there’s definitely things people want to consider that you don’t realise. Don’t wait until everything is closed and then you’re like, oh, health insurance, wait a minute. How’s that going to work, like my daughter had a horse, and that’s expensive. And so who’s gonna be responsible for that kind of stuff. So you want to have a checklist and really think through as many things as possible. And it’s the important things and you do want to be somewhat fair. If something’s not important to you, and you know.

It’s important to the other person that you be reasonable and give that and stand for the things that are really important to you. You might wind up going back to work, a lot of women do have to figure out okay, I haven’t been in the workforce for 15 years. What do I do in that situation, and I trained a lot on an abundant mindset. And you know, just how to create wealth from a place of abundance. Because so many women get into a place of poverty, when they’re going through divorce, because they get in scarcity of there’s never gonna be enough. And there’s so much insecurity that’s around the money. So I work with him on a lot of the mindset that has to do with just flow of how things can work and how to attract what you need.

Pamela Bardhi
I love that, like, Kelli, thank you so much for sharing that. And, again, I mean, you just never know who’s going through what and what their situation is, and all of that. It’s just been so many different people who’ve gone through divorce that have been presented to me, and I’ve always. It’s always been a challenge of mine and I’m sure we’ve all listeners who have had friends or family or whatever. What’s the best way to deal with it? And I mean, another thing that just popped in my mind is the question of how do you handle it with children? Right?

Kelli Calabrese
Yeah, that’s a great question. So the statistics for divorce children are not good. But it doesn’t have to be that way, so they’re more likely to themselves be divorced to have teenage pregnancy crime. I mean, if you look at the statistics, I actually have a report on my website, kellicalabrese.com, how to not have your child be a statistic of divorce. And there’s 12 different points that you can do there. Because it doesn’t have to be a normal average statistic. Your child can just thrive and be well, kids handle it differently. Even in the same family. Two or three different children can all do something different.

Girls tend to shut down and isolate, boys tend to get angry and act out. But it could flip could be the other way. Kids want their parents to be together no matter what even if it wasn’t a good situation. Example of marriage, even if it was abusive in a kid’s heart, they always even older kids want their parents to be together. So let love win is just a good rule. Like looking through the lens of love winning what would be the best thing to happen in this situation. And it’s about the quality, not the quantity of time. So when you’re with them, just have deep conversations, be connected with them do meaningful things. Let them know that they’re loved that obviously, this wasn’t their fault.

And kids are pretty resilient. But again, getting help for the kids is always a great idea that they have support because kids don’t talk about that. They’re not sitting at the lunch table in third grade or seventh grade, talking about their parents getting divorced. And half of the kids at the table are experiencing that. So it’s important that they do have an outlet, physical sports, music. Something where they have a happy place that they can go and express and be and have mentors and safe adults around them. Whether it’s through church or neighbours, or for my kids, some of my girlfriends were really helpful to my daughter because she you know. Knew them and love them and trusted them. So having trusting adults around is good, too.

What Would Kelli’s Older Self Tell Her Younger Self

Pamela Bardhi
I love that. Kelli, thank you so much for for sharing that. Truly, I mean, because you know, all these questions come up. There’s so many variables to the relationships in your life that get affected when a divorce happens. So thank you so much for that insight. And you mentioned that you wrote one of your books. So basically the passion nice does. I think it was what would your older self tell your younger self? And that was the one question that I wanted to ask you.

Kelli Calabrese
Yeah, that’s a great question. I would say Have more fun yeah, I’m someone who’s very intense and discipline and do everything meaningful. And you know, I probably took myself a little too seriously. So I would say enjoy the process a lot more, I was always really driver, just striving and driving and kicking doors down and I would say now to sit back a little bit and receive more. And be open to the flow of things coming to you and that you don’t have to work for or pay for everything. There’s this you know, a planting of seeds and a harvesting that happens and I probably missed out on a lot of fun things opportunity growth, multiplication.

Because I just had my head down running all the time. So being present is really the most valuable thing and not thinking so much about the future or really at all about the past. Because most of that isn’t even how we remember it and we need to renew our minds every day to what’s our current situation. So I would say you know, get present, let love win and have some fun along the way. It’s not all stress intense and fearful and difficult.

Pamela Bardhi
Oh that Kelli I love that. And you mentioned before this call to that your only conversation that you’re interested in 2022 is meaningful. So what’s up in your world? What’s coming on? And Kelli world?

Kelli Calabrese
Yeah, that’s a great question. So I have had a word of the year for the last 15 years and my word for this year has been meaningful. And the word reveals itself as the year goes on, so what it’s meant for me is that I only want to do things that are meaningful. But I also get to give the meaning to whatever happens in my life, you know. Like a divorce or a partnership not working or a business idea falling apart. So the word doesn’t end when the year ends, I still intend to do very meaningful things. I word for 2022 is victory, so this is the year where I really get to walk into the victory of all the good things that I have planted.

And the thing I’m most focused on is speaking. I’ve been speaking a lot for corporations on a variety of topics from health and relationships. But also helping those hurting women who need to come out of this divorce, grief, and get to a place of abundance and joy and celebration and love. So I have a programme called intentionally fabulous that I launched earlier this year. And it’s exactly for that it walks women through all the steps to get through this and to come out well on the other side.

Pamela Bardhi
That’s incredible. Kelli, you are such a rockstar. I’m so excited to see what 2022 brings for you. Because you hustled and done so much and for it to be the year of harvest is always super exciting. So thank you for that. I’m excited for you. Do you hear? Oh my goodness. Okay, you gotta let everyone know where to find you and your awesomeness.

Kelli Calabrese
Yes. So my website is kellicalabrese.com. And then my name on all the places Facebook, LinkedIn. It’s my name everywhere so they can find me if they’re a woman going through a divorce. My private free group is called intentionally fabulous. And I pour into there every day we talk about the hard things we encourage each other. We laugh so go to intentionally fabulous if you’re a woman going through a divorce.

Pamela Bardhi
I love it. Kelli, thank you so much for being here today. You are a total Rockstar and I’m just so grateful for you. So thank you so much.

Kelli Calabrese
Thank you, Pam was my honor to be here. So much fun. Blessings to you.

Pamela Bardhi
So that’s it for today’s episode of underdog. Catch us next week, always dropping on Thursdays. And remember, if you’re interested in real estate. Or want to learn how to create more money and magic in your life. Check out meetwithpamela.com and let’s chat sending you so much love.

Tune in to the episode to hear the rest of my incredible interview with the amazing Kelli Calabrese.