Jax Scott

Jax Scott is a superwoman. She’s a director, Cyber-Tech Blogger, Keynote Speaker, Special Ops Electronic Warfare/Cyber (Warrant Officer), and a Cyber Threat Intel. Also, she is a Co-host of Hackerz And Haecksen Podcast. She has held positions on boards of nonprofits providing tactical advice and held executive leadership roles providing cybersecurity guidance to foreign leaders. She is an expert in military cyber policy and has led global development operations in cyber countermeasures to mitigate near-peer attacks. Along with technology, she loves to write and founded Beans + Bytes™ as a way for her to share her knowledge and passion with the world.

Jax has over 17 years experience working in military operations where she worked on a special unit that offered gender-specific intelligence and security solutions. She is committed to her growth as a leader and is currently co-authoring a cybersecurity book and finishing her Master’s in Cybersecurity Risk Management at Georgetown University.

Website/s: https://beansandbytesblog.com/ and Outpostgray.com

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/iamjax/

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Jax Scott Shares Her Ultimate Underdog Story of “Failures” & Unstoppable Resilience

Pamela Bardhi
Hello everyone and welcome to another episode of underdog. Today I have an incredible guest here with me. She’s so amazing in so many different ways. Jax, how are you?

Jax Scott
Oh my god. Pamela, I’m so excited to be here. We’re finally making it happen.

Pamela Bardhi
I’m so excited to have you here. Thank you so much for being here. I’ll never forget your message when you send it to me on LinkedIn after you watched my trailer. And I was just oh my god, my heart just like, Oh, it was just the most beautiful message. I’ll just never forget that. I just hope you know this as well as how much that meant to me. So thank you so much for believing in the underdog and just for sharing your story today. I’m just so thrilled and honored to have you. And now I’m going to start you off with the most loaded question humanly possible. Jags What inspired you on your journey to where you are today? My friend?

Jax Scott
Oh my gosh, yeah. So I actually prepared for this question because I’m a big fan of the show. And I knew that this was going to come up and I think it is a critical part to understand somebody’s journey. Where they’ve come from, to get them to where they are. And you know, like a lot of people’s journeys. Mine definitely had a lot of struggles and I don’t think it’s really unconventional there. But what I’m going to do is talk about the struggles and then, how I took those lessons to get me to where I am in my life. Really my childhood was a pretty dark place. I was homeschooled. When I did finally go to school and about fifth grade, I was bullied, I had a speech impediment.

And my just overall life black, like the family life, was really toxic. So you can imagine when you finally go into a school setting. I started taking my family life into my school setting. Which turned into me being just an absolute terror, I didn’t have a lot of friends, I was instead being bullied. I became the bully, I started fights, I didn’t get along with most of the teachers. And this progress, I mean, I was in detention all the time and this was not at home intention. They always put me in a closet somewhere, because they didn’t want to reward me for my actions. It was a really dark place, It was also a time when I was about 17 years old, I decided. You know what, I’m not going to live in this house anymore.

I’m going to move out and my parents looked at me and they said Good luck. We’ll take you to wherever you want to go and they did. They dropped me off and I actually had a guardian at 17 years old. And I lived and this was about my high school year and so from about 17 to 17 and a half. I walked to school, I went to high school and I worked at night and I worked. A telemarketing job and I paid for what I could for graduation. And then about 17 and a half at this time, too, I thought oh, I’m free. I don’t have to live that lifestyle anymore. This is great, I was starting to have friends in a way I was just sleeping in the friend. One of my friends’ Florida house, that was it.

And it was a wonderful life. Like that was one of the best times of my childhood and then about 17 and a half. I got a curfew violation, which is a thing and I had to go to court for it. They had mailed a letter to my parents and I didn’t realize that and my parents showed up. And the moral of that story is try to intercept the mail before your parents get it. Because even though my guardian was there. My parents had the ultimate say, which was to bring me back into the house. So at 17 and a half, I got court-ordered back into the house. This is really a pivotal time because I didn’t want it to happen.

The courts didn’t know what they were getting ready to put me back into. And so I kind of took the mentality of you know, I’ll try to join them instead of like, fight them. So this is part of my life where I started trying to do all the things for everybody else. I started to get my cosmetology degree and I started working for ups and I became a part-time supervisor at 19. The only female in the facility and I wasn’t happy. Shockingly, I wasn’t happy and I decided I’m going to quit it all. I’m 19 years old now, I feel like I’ve lived a lifetime and I decided to start my own perfume business selling. Perfume out of the trunk of my car in America. Literally.

I would buy perfume for $10 and I would sell it for 20 and I would put it in the trunk of my car. And I had teams that worked with me and for the next year of my life. We hustled the streets and I made about 15 to $2,000. A week and I had two different storefronts and I did that for about a year. My parents were furious with me, they hated that I was doing that. And I realized I was about 20 and I realized, okay. This is not where I want to go with my life. So I decided to listen to the army and so the army was a good decision for me in many ways, but it also really surprised me in many ways.

As a younger kid, you know, I had a voice, it wasn’t the best voice, but I did have a voice and I had a lot of creativity. But when I joined the military, I almost got kicked out and four years in. Because of my mannerisms, of just being really abrupt, speaking up when I shouldn’t, things like that, that you don’t do in the military. And so I went through this major suppression of my voice in my mid-20s. During that time, I also got married right around my mid-20s and I married a narcissist. A very abusive man and he was a narcissist. So I’m still trying to like, you can imagine I’m still trying to find myself. I’m still like, Okay, I’m in the military. Now.

They’re telling me to be quiet. Sit down, draw, now I’m dating this man. Now, at that time, I thought I had my life figured out, I was going to go to the FBI. I was in college, I was in the police academy, I was in the military doing all these things. And fast forward a year into marriage and I’m doing none of those things and I’m very depressed. I’m being verbally beaten down and that was another turning point in my life that I said, I’m not going to live this way. This isn’t what I want. And I literally quit my job, cut my hair, divorced him, sold my house, put as much as I could into a haul. I drove to three states and I went to Colorado.

And I started over on November 1, 2008, in Colorado and I didn’t know anybody. I had a personal training certification that I had gotten and I started completely over from scratch. It was during that time that I was really starting to kind of find myself. But I hadn’t healed from my childhood trauma and I was trying to heal, but the process of that is very hard. And during that time, I got called up and tried out for a program for the Special Forces. That was called the cultural support team program. So in my late 20s, now, I still haven’t held from any of my childhood trauma. Or anything like that and now I’m like, Yay, let’s go be part of the Special Forces, this will be awesome.

Like I can put all my energy into my physical being. I’m a lawyer and I was a lawyer. So for the next three years, I crushed it, I was deployed multiple times with special ops. I worked on multiple different teams, I did over 20 direct action operations. Meaning I would be in bed with these teams into villages and we would do night raids. And I would assist them with getting information off the women and children. To assist them with operations and assist with filling the information gaps for the intelligence picture, that we would gather. And it was an amazing time, I didn’t realize the trauma that I was compounding on top of myself. Through this deployment and the things that I was seeing. Because my childhood was traumatic.

So war to me was just the same kind of trauma, just different. It wasn’t affecting me like it would affect some people in real-time, It was exciting, It was fun, It wasn’t until I hit like my early 30s that I started. Some of this stuff started compounding and alcoholism started taking a role in my life. And I was also believing I was about seven years into pollinia. At this time, I was very insecure with who I was both just external and internal. I decided one day when I was almost 30-31 and I said. You know what, I’m packing a bag and I’m going to Asia. And I don’t know where I’m going. I went to Thailand and I spent a month in Thailand And then, I spent two months in Bali.

And I was mostly by myself and I hung out with you know, the just other not even natives checks. I stayed in a surf check house most of the time. And I just served and I dove and I rode my motorcycle everywhere and I ate whatever I wanted. I was called an American belly, I was almost 190 pounds at this time and I said you know what. I’m going to love myself, I don’t care and this has started to go through my healing process. But I wasn’t there yet, so I came back to the States. About 2013 from this journey and I wanted to start another business, I was ready to stop being full-time in the military and go into the National Guard.

And I did just that. I actually moved to Vegas and I assisted some gentlemen that were also special operations. Operators that had retired and I assisted them with launching their first company in Vegas in 2015. So I uprooted again, at this time, I lived everywhere on the East Coast overseas back in Colorado and I said alright. I’ll go to Vegas and I went there and I stayed with this company for about a year. Until I met my business partner right around 2016. So everybody listening kind of fully understood, I still had a lot of trauma. I hadn’t even started looking at the military trauma, that PTSD post-traumatic stress that I had.

Now I’m working around a whole bunch of prior special ops. That also had their own fair share of PTSD, which was you’re in this environment that is kind of fostering that. And I started working with my business partner and my insecurity started coming out. Because I was seeing that I lacked a lot of confidence with believing my voice again. Now back to the initial part of the story. It had been suppressed for so long and I hadn’t realized it. Until I had to actually start pitching proposals and explaining to people. Why should they buy my company’s services. Well, if you don’t believe in yourself, how are you going to believe in your company? Or anything that you sell, but I still wasn’t wise enough at this time to understand that. It wasn’t until I was around 2017.

That I was afforded an opportunity to go on this all-expense-paid trip to the Grand Canyon for veterans. It was a week-long trip and during this trip, I was still drinking a lot. I was still in a very bad depressed state trying to basically numb it, I guess, at that time with alcoholism. And I’m on this trip and I met a woman who does Reiki. Before this, I had heard about energy work and mindset work, but I hadn’t. I always thought it was super wonky and like, Oh, that’s not for me. They are just weird people and it was during this trip. We had seven days together and about the third or fourth day, I was fine.

Like Alright, let me give this a test. She’s a little weird. I’ll try it out and That was my turning point. She did some body scans and things we talked about, really opened me up to a lot of things. It also taught me how I was really learning and how I had so much anger inside of me, I was so angry. There would be years before you would even see me draw ads here. I didn’t cry, I prided myself on not having emotions. And so that time was when I felt like I had to start working on myself. I’ve got to start working on my mindset and I’ve got to start shutting off some of this anger about 2018. My business partner and I are in the very first part of January, February 2018.

We decided to part ways amicably, because it wasn’t working out and I decided, I would run the business. Because I knew best what was for the business, everything would be fine. I’ll show you and I was still drinking heavily, I was still not fully healed. It’s a process and this was the point in my life where everything I lost. Everything I got out of the lease that I was in, I sold everything that wasn’t buckled down to the floor. I literally kept my bed, I sold all my furniture, I got rid of it, I dumped it. It was primarily for two reasons I needed the money. But I also needed to pay for the smallest storage unit possible and so I got rid of everything I could.

And the only thing I couldn’t get rid of was my truck. Because I was upside down on it. My credit score went down to about 510. I had no place to live. The friends that I thought I had during this time, were kicking me while I was down. But for and I say friends with quotes. Because I was still drawing in narcissistic and damaged people because I was damaged. I didn’t realize that at the time, but I started realizing that I have really good people in my life. But it took me losing everything to gain everything because I literally had no way to go but up. And that’s when I started having to like, I had to start looking internal, I had to start working on myself.

I started with a book called calling in the one and it was a relationship healing book. That was a 12 step process book that really started digging into my childhood and my trauma there. And then my relationship traumas that I had it was a tough book. It took me probably 24 weeks to go through a 12-week program, It was hard, a lot of tears, a lot of healing. Fast forward into 2019 right before 2019 I had a dear friend, a sergeant major, reach out to me and he called me saying it was late 2018. He said, Hey, I want you to go on deployment with us with 10 Special Forces Group to Europe. I want you to come over to the unit out of the blue.

And I said sure, like, I don’t have much going on. I acted like I did, but I’m kind of homeless sleeping on the floor at my friend’s house. Sure, so I accepted the call I went to be interviewed for. That was when I was finally, able to deploy in 2019 for nearly a year into Europe. Working with the 10th group and a couple of things happened during that time. I was able to finally breathe again for the first time in years and had a steady paycheck coming in, I was able to take a moment and just stop and like, okay. Where did Jax want to go, where have I been? Where do I want to go? And now it was when I really had to take stock in and you talk about this a lot of times on your show.

Who are the five people in my life right now, who are my influence says, and do are they going to be? The individuals that are going to get me to where I want to be? That was a hard truth. And then the other thing I had to do was find mentors, people that are there that could help me get there. What did that look like and books and I studied, I educated, I completely changed, what I knew what I had been taught or not taught? And I started doing all of the things that I’d never done before and one of my quotes that I always say is. If you want to be and do something that you’ve never done before. You need to do things that you’ve never done before.

And that’s where a lot of people fall short if they tried to keep doing the same things. That I wasn’t doing anything, but creating trauma and pain. So I started reading, I started connecting with mentors, I got rid of all of my toxic friends. Then I started networking and I said, you know what universe and I put it out into the universe. I’m going to move to DC by the end of this year in 2019, I’m moving to DC, I’m growing my network, I’m rebranding myself, I’m changing this entire image. And by the end of 2019, I had met the correct contact that had given me a referral to a company, that hired me out in DC. I had barely a two week window by the time, I got back to pack my stuff to move to that job.

And as soon as I got out here at the end of 2019, I decided this is my chance. This is it, I can change everything for the better with the mindset and energy work. And I had the money at the time to start hiring life coaches and spiritual coaches into my life. I’ve had three since then working with one now. The game-changer for me was finally believing myself. But it’s so much easier to say that than do it, but it was really believing in myself. Stepping out of my comfort zone and realizing that the life.

It’s just the life that I was born into and I didn’t know any better. And I was able to gain that power back and I’ve shifted everything. We were just talking right before this call me in a year. I have completely changed my brand. But through that, because that doesn’t just have you can’t just change your brand. I have changed my entire energy, my friends. The people that are around me, I like oh my gosh, I just I feel love.

It’s not anger, I feel love there. There’s peace now and I know that my journey in some ways has just begun. But I actually look forward to seeing where’s my future going to go now. And I tell people according to where it how I was born. I shouldn’t be where I’m at today and it wasn’t easy to get here. But anybody can do it. They just have to put the work into it. And they have to work through their mindset.

Pamela Bardhi
Oh my god, Jax, I’m freaking mind blown. Like I say your journey is just like, Wow, thank you so much for sharing like that raw, like authentic. Hey, here’s where I’ve truly been right and like. I see so many parallels in our lives and it’s crazy. When you were talking about showing emotion I was that person I was like. If I ever showed an ounce of weakness, it was like No, like yeah, lugging forward. You’re not crying, keep going, find a solution, keep grinding, right? And keep moving and it took me a long time. This podcast is really what brought me into this and challenged my own self and like saying, you know, like, hey, vulnerability is actually a strength. Yeah. No emotion.

It’s a strength, it means that you’ve healed from all that trauma. All the trauma that you were talking about, like. I was once with a very narcissistic, verbally abusive human being as well. I know what that does to you. But you don’t realise it at the end during like, I literally remember just like looking back on photos and I’m like, that was me. And then you think about like, holy crap. Like, imagine if I made that choice to stay with that person and where I would be now. Terrified. So let’s say for you like and it’s like you find yourself at this moment in your life that you’re like, How the hell did I get here?

Jax Scott
Yeah. Oh, absolutely. I felt that several times in my life. Like, how in the heck did I get here? Yeah, it’s crazy. Because in it happens, it happens to good people. But because you don’t have the right tools in the toolkit is the mindset. It’s the filter that we see on life, our perception is our reality. But that filter is created from our childhood unless we learn how to develop and change that filter.

Pamela Bardhi
Right? And you get this like sense of awareness. So like, I’ve done a lot of energy work too, so like, what you’re saying like I’m totally resonating. I feel like we’ve gone on very similar life paths. The energy work has really been something that has transformed me as well. Everything is energy in this life, everything is there you can manifest you can destroy. You can do whatever is right, but what happens is because we are souls as humans. They say we live, we’ve lived many lifetimes, and that there are traumas within us. That has affected us from the past that we don’t even know about.

And then we have our own lives on top of that. Yeah. Oh, you blend that all in and you’re carrying all the traumas and you’re not aware. You’re going to keep going through these cycles of life. These patterns that are going to be unexplained until you get to the point. You kind of pull yourself out and you’re like, what am I doing? And it’s incredible that you got to that point several times. Well, what I adore about you is like, every single time that you were kind of going through it, you just kept going. Like I want to know what was in the mind of Jack’s, like, throughout your whole life and also to the bullying.

That was another thing I was bullied to in middle school. So in like fifth and sixth grade, I was bullied because I was actually a quiet kid. And I didn’t know why these girls would pick on me and I was like traumatised by it. But then what the same thing that happened to happen to me in seventh grade, I became the bully. Yeah, I didn’t know what you know. And then I became this, oh, if you say the thing about me, like, you know, hard-headed, confrontational like a crazy kid. Like, that’s what I was in middle school. It’s crazy, every single step that we’ve been through, very parallel, which I find insane.

So like, in the mind of jacks, what has always propelled you forward. It seems that you always have this problem-solving mentality. Which is so beautiful and you just kept going like the perfumes in your car, like you just. I’m gonna get some back to my house. All right, cool, I’m going to make like eight grand a month at, I don’t know, 19 no big deal. Like, that’s not a normal 19 year old things like walk me through, like your mentality or what has really influenced you in your early years? And then sort of how that’s progress.

Jax Scott
Such a great question. And it’s a tough answer because I don’t believe that it’s black and white. Because it’s something that has just been inside of me since I was a young kid. Even when I was a young kid, I used to tell people, I got to cure cancer, I’m going to create peace in the world. And so I’m always in that aspect. I’ve always thought like, really large or myself and as a kid, it was tough. But even now and even through some of the hard military schools, I always say there’s an end.

And no matter how tough it gets, there’s always a light at the end of the tunnel. If you just keep pushing, but what drives me, what really drives me is just something internally inside of me in my gut. I think you can understand this, like, I know, I’m going to change the world. And I know that I’m changing the world now. The people that are around me and I’m impacting them, but I mean. Like really changing the world and I’ve always felt that inside of me whatever level and scale that is on.

That’s what I believe that my mission here is to do is to change the world. And I just keep pushing harder and I always believe that the struggles that I have gone through. Has just created more resilience inside of me and empathy for so many people like yourself that have experienced these traumas. Because I can relate with almost every person in some way. I’m like, yep, I’ve been there, I understand that. And that’s what keeps me driving forward is like, Okay, this is a lesson. This is for my future. Good future me and that’s what pushes me now.

 Jax’s Inspiration Throughout Her Journey

Pamela Bardhi
You’re a total badass Jack’s I seriously. I mean, it just takes so much heart and so much courage to push like that. You know what I mean? Like, it’s not like a normal thing to just be able to handle that like at a young age. Moving out, doing your thing, coming back, starting your own perfume business. Then going into special ops and just like your whole trajectory, I mean, it’s just like, it’s outstanding.

And just like your discipline throughout it all. I like amazes me so much, because you just kept going no matter how many times you fell, you got back up. I’m like, I want to know all about Jack’s like, how did she just like keep moving forward? So when you were mentioning like, yes, like everything has an end that that for sure. But was there a particular person that inspired you in your early years? Or like what else was sort of happening during that time?

Jax Scott
That’s a another interesting question. Because for the longest time until I probably got into my 20s 30s I didn’t really have like mentors in my life. I had people that would occasionally believe in me. But Pamela I had most people that thought I was just a troubled kid and he didn’t know how to handle me. And I had an officer one time lock me up and yell at me, because I had said something truthful. But hurtful and disrespectful things to one of the officers and that he locked me up. And right after that, I had the entire base and all the military police watching me and every single move I did was always watch.

So instead of mentoring, like I look back on my younger self and I’m like, wow, I would have seen this troubled kid outspoken, troubled. But I would have tried to help instead. I would be pushed in the corner and be told to behave myself. You’re going to lose your or you’re going to be kicked out of the military, you know, lose your job. And now everybody on the base is watching you. So that really put me in a dark place where my mentors were books. Even then I didn’t realise how much knowledge was in books. And if like my younger self, I would have said, dive into more books. Or reach into your network and find somebody that’s successful that you want to talk to.

But I didn’t have those people I didn’t grow up that way. And I really just had me and I became minus the couple of friends I had. I was a loner, I was very, I just did everything on my own. Because I knew if I did stuff on my own, I couldn’t get in trouble kind of was my mentality. And so I just stayed off to my own. But I excelled in the military very quickly, I gained most of my rank within my first like four to five years. I went to some of the most difficult schools that you can go to as a woman.

And then even being part of that programme that was before women. Can even be selected into the infantry roles before Congress had allowed women into infantry roles. So groups of us were just breaking barriers. But I was always all about breaking barriers. And I think my drive was me telling myself and proving to myself. That I was good enough to love that I was good enough to be accepted, because I didn’t accept myself. So I kept pushing myself.

And I’m like, if I get this, if I accomplish this, then I’m good enough, maybe my family to love me. Or maybe I’ll be loved by my significant other, maybe I’ll just love myself. That was the deciding thing was, Oh, my God. I just need to love myself and screw what everybody else thinks. And I still drive and I push really, really hard. But I have a lot more grace and a lot more kindness for myself when I’m tired. Instead of working 90 to 100 hours a week and I’m like, calm down. It’s okay. You have you have time, it’ll be okay.

Pamela Bardhi
Such a rock star with everything that you went through and then to be able to recognise your traumas. Because that’s another thing, we could be walking around in these patterns. The hardest part is to become aware of them and to break them. So I know that you mentioned that the Reiki was a big part in this transformation. And this shift for you walks me through what it took to gain that awareness in different ways. Maybe techniques or something that you tried. Then, how did you actually break those patterns? So those are the two hardest things to do and we all carry traumas and many different ways.

And it’s like, but like you said and I’ll never forget this quote. When you were mentioning this earlier, like, I didn’t realise that. Because I was so broken inside, you were attracting broken people. Anybody who’s listening right now, if you are not recognising your traumas and what’s going on inside of you. You will continue to attract that into your life, subconsciously and that’s the scary part. You’re not going to know. And so you make the effort to become aware and be like, Oh, crap, just like you did Jax. Where you were like, darn, I was angry. I was dark, right?

Jax Scott
Yeah, it was a dark time and with Reiki, I encourage any of the listeners to do it if they’re afraid of doing spiritual work. I would just encourage just getting online. And just researching and understanding mindset awareness. Because that’s the key when you start understanding your mindset. Which was what Reiki was teaching me is how do you feel when the situation takes place? Or this argument takes place? You’re having this call with one at that time, one of my toxic friends? How does that make you feel? And when I started, it was a process.

So when I started taking stock, more of my unconscious thoughts started. Becoming more conscious, certain things started changing, I started losing friends, that was a big shift. I also started realising and because I’m an analyst, I started analysing my life more and going, Okay. All of these things are out of whack. Or the guys that are dating were not very, very good men. Even at that time, I still hadn’t learned that I was projecting that out and getting that back. That was probably my number one thing was, Why do I keep attracting these, like toxic men? And then I just, it’s a hard truth. But that’s where I sat in on when.

And I called the girlfriend, the dear friend still today and I went. I’m realising I’m the deciding factor like I am the constant and all of these, I’m a good person. But there’s something that I’m doing that is projecting out that is bringing that back. I didn’t have that answer, I will tell you I probably didn’t have that answer for another year. Year and a half, because there were so many layers that I had to work. Through military trauma, childhood trauma, relationship trauma. That I had been in this mindset of trauma for so long that I had all I knew, what I knew is love was trauma. When people were mistreating me that was love.

And when I look back on myself even just a couple of years ago. I’m like, Oh my gosh, I can’t believe If I was supposed to like that, but I didn’t know any different. That’s why women that are in abusive relationships stay in abusive relationships. Because they don’t think they deserve better and I know that sounds crazy. But that is the truth, I didn’t realise that I deserved it. People like you in my life like caring, loving, genuine, supportive people. That will love me for my authentic self like that is a wild concept, but that’s where I live right now.

But it was through taking awareness of every conversation. If I got off a call, a business call or anything family call. Whatever it was and I sat there and I would think, how did that call make me feel? And if it didn’t make me feel good, I would call What am I call my energy friends. I would call on my energy friends and be like, this didn’t make me feel good. Then they would walk me through the process of like, we’re in your childhood. Did you ever feel that way before? Why do you feel that way? And now that process has gotten easier for me.

So when I call them triggers, when I have these like triggers or my intuition, or my ego, like, hey, this doesn’t feel right. It’s kind of what you said, instead of repeating that lesson over and over again. Now having it brings in the toxic guys again. Or having the business partner talk down to me whatever the situation is. I change that dialogue and realise that lesson is coming to me as a blessing for me. To be able to heal around that now and fix my energy around that. So universe doesn’t have to give me that lesson again. Because that’s what it is.

We’re gonna repeat lessons in our life over and over again. Until we learn that lesson, we cancel and delete. And so I just cancel and delete and sometimes I might not get that cancel and delete perfect. That thing might come back, but it won’t come back. 100% like, I might not get that crazy narcissistic guy, but I might attract like an alcoholic. That means well, but he’s an alcoholic. Those are actually things that I’ve seen on the Hill around it, that lesson will come to me just not as big and prevalent.

I might not see it right away. But I take I have stuck with my feelings. That is the biggest thing is how does that makes you feel being in the military, we don’t. And in my family, you don’t deal with feelings. So that was a really hard thing for me to be okay with embracing my feelings. And feelings aren’t a bad thing. I embrace those. It’s such a process.

Pamela Bardhi
And it’s so different for everyone. Because every trauma is different and then you know, for anyone who believes in this. There’s past life trauma, through the lives of you before, you know about what is affecting you here now.

Jax Scott
And you come in with a template from your past life trauma. Yeah, it’s wild stuff.

Pamela Bardhi
Wild stuff and that awareness. But once you get that awareness in you, then the next level is like breaking through them. And then it’s like you said, these lessons that you’re constantly. Because you’re gonna get hit with the same lessons over and over and over and over until you’ve mastered that lesson. And then you move on and you continue to elevate and elevate and elevate. I find your story so remarkable, because like you’ve just been constantly rebuilding.

So for people who are going through something dark. Or whatever it is that they’re going through at that point in time right now, where they feel like. They have to rebuild because especially with COVID, like COVID has shaken up the world. I think there are a lot of positives but then there’s also a lot of negatives, as well. And like a lot of people right now are needing to rebuild. What would be your top tips in like, shifting that like how maybe shifting your energy like any recommendations that you have, like, okay, you’re at rock bottom, what now?

Jax Scott
That is definitely a very good question because it’s shifted. So I will say the best tip from my last rock bottom in 2018 is admitting that it sucks. It’s okay to be like this, where I’m at right now sucks. And then in some way, figure out how that is a blessing for you. I would suggest maybe it’s a blessing that you have an opportunity to restart. And therefore you have a blank canvas. So you get to recreate your story the way that you want it to be told, it’s a tough time and it’s okay to be down on yourselves. Give yourself grace, accept yourself for where you’re at.

And then set a goal to create a 47 inch whiteboard. I don’t have a TV, I have a whiteboard in my house. So create a goal like sit down, accept where you’re at be like, Okay. This sucks where I’m at, okay, but I’m not going to, I’m not going to be here forever. Where do I want to go? What are the goals that I need to do to get there? And then the other thing is, if it’s not a book, find a mentor. If your mentor is a book, educate yourself that’s another key to goal setting. Educate yourself and then accept and be in just have grace for yourself for where you’re at and where you’re going.

Pamela Bardhi
I love it. And you mentioned like 2018 was your most recent one and now you’re in this beautiful space a walk through all the awesomeness. What are you up to like these days decks?

Jax Scott
That’s my last starting over. I think the universe gave me the lessons to start over because they’re like she’s gonna get it. It’s time Oh, she’s gonna totally get it this time. And then in 2008, they’re probably all looking around, they’re like, okay, we’re gonna have to shake this one up. She’s not getting it. But I figured it out. Thank you. I’m good, I’m good. No more lessons, no more big lessons, everything is up and up. It’s so awesome. We launched a podcast called hackers and a half cents. Which is the cybersecurity podcast. An inclusive platform where we’re able to share stories about people in the industry or coming into the industry.

I’m currently co-authoring a cybersecurity book that’ll publish in the fall, I’m actually looking at co-authoring. I just had a call the other day to co-author another book here, in the very near future. A lot of opportunities on the table to relaunch my security firm into a consulting company, nothing immediately. But that’s definitely why I’ve been having that kind of get moved around, I’ve actually taken things off my plate. Because I have taken on so many blessings that it was like, I need to take a few things off. So I can just super hyper-focus and my focus right now is on the things that I mentioned.

And then really branding myself, I want to do a TED talk more than anything. Because I want to eventually get to a place where I can speak and be motivated. And encourage other people to work on their mindset in their spiritual development to help them get from where they are, to where they’re going. So those are, those are my big goals. I have a whiteboard with other tangible goals in front of me and I’m just blessed and painful. I’m thankful I’m awake now and I can see and I can make these changes. Because it’s up and up from here on definitely.

Pamela Bardhi
I love that Jax. And you touched on this a little bit earlier. But I’ll ask you again because you’re just so dynamic and there’s probably many levels to this. But what would your older self tell your younger self, based on what you know now in your life experiences?

Jax Scott
Good Lord, I would just shake my younger, younger self and be like, wake up I would I yeah, just wake up. But honestly, keep doing what you’re doing. You’re gonna finally figure it you’ll figure it out. I would that would be it. Keep doing what you’re doing, because I wouldn’t. My journeys been really hard. And I wouldn’t want it on anybody. But it’s made me extremely strong and extremely resilient and very thankful and very humble. So I would just say keep doing what you’re doing. You’re going to figure it out eventually. Hopefully.

Pamela Bardhi
Oh my god, you’re such a rock star, rock star ducks. And I mean and then because you’ve also been a startup entrepreneur, as well to like. What would you be your piece of advice to the entrepreneurs out there who are like, could just be starting,

Jax Scott
Oh my gosh, I love it. It’s going to be so exciting, It’s going to be so hard, but it’s going to be so rewarding. And if you can take any piece of advice again, educate, educate, educate. I wish I had educated myself more. The first time I launched my company and then got some mentors, a circle of friends. Whoever that, make sure that you have a good network. But educate yourself. When you think that you know everything, yeah, you’re in the wrong space. You’re never gonna know enough. Yeah, right. Amen. Jax is an amazing camera. I love it.

Pamela Bardhi
You’re So Amazing. Now like you gotta let everyone know where to find you and your awesomeness.

Jax Scott
The easiest way to find me is just that. Just find me on LinkedIn. Jax Scott. I have a blog. It’s called beans invites like coffee beansandbytesblog.com. That’s the easiest. I’m always on LinkedIn. I don’t do any other social media. Or you can find me on Pamela show underdog when the podcast comes out right here.

Pamela Bardhi
Yes, dogs. Thank you so much for being here. Today. You’re such a rock star. I adore you and I can’t wait to see how you blow up from here. Seriously, you’re gonna crush it. I’m so proud of you, girl.

Tune in to the episode to hear the rest of my incredible interview with the amazing Jax Scott.